Growing older what the hell do I do 18 now bout to finish senior year and finally graduate soon Not even 20 yet and might have been having a midlife crisis The f*ck do I do with my life with all these damn prices Decisions, my music, my living, my passions Clouding up my vision making my emotions my limits Keep this up and your music and your life ain't going nowhere Creating barriers, songs delete over and over Again with this bullshit AJY you're such a coward Why you even letting your mind, tears control ya I understand it's deeper than just money You wanna take care of yourself, parents, and your future family Ain't no doubt that I can tell that you care I mean you are me You wanna make these songs but the public is so scary Yo voice ain't that special you want it to sound manly You wanna make it you anxious for people to be comparing right Feeling so lost, drowning in my own life Only thing to think of right now is to write Feeling so lost, drowning in my own life Lonely feelings reeling in my mind that always lies I got the motivation Can't fulfill my aspirations with dedication Thoughts making dreams fiction So why am I chasing dead ends Because I'm yearning Low probability but I'm willing To put in the time working I say that now But what if I fail will all that be for nothing I still shouldn't care though Better than busting tables all night to get low pay so I can't complain I'm privileged That is prolly why I feel like I got bigger shoes to fill in Parents worked so hard to get where we are at man what am I doing I'm tired of school and life cause all I call myself is stupid Can't understand a god damn thing are people judging Cutting loose ends off am I appreciated yet Is my perception right and wrong is something broken with my head Should I just quit my dreams, step in reality instead Go to college after this and have a lifelong plan Never had these insecurities way back when I began damn Feeling so lost, drowning in my own life Only thing to think of right now is to write Feeling so lost, drowning in my own life Lonely feelings reeling in my mind that always lies Ohhhh I wanna be happy Not tonight Oh I need to be I want to be Why can't I be there I know I will But still am stuck By my mind